Coming 2026
New Book · 2026
About the book
The Trench is real.
There’s a way out.
Dr. Corey Allan has spent twenty years as a marriage and family therapist watching couples sink into what he calls The Trench — the emotional collapse that turns two people who love each other into two people who can’t stop hurting each other.
The Trench doesn’t just show up in marriage. It shows up with your kids, your parents, your closest friends. But marriage is where it runs deepest and costs the most.
Go First gives you a clear, actionable framework for climbing out — not by fixing your spouse, but by leading yourself. You’ll learn to regulate your own nervous system, see the people you love more accurately, tell the truth without needing anyone to like it, and show up as your full self in every relationship that matters — including the bedroom.
The principle is simple. The practice is hard. And when one person decides to go first, everything changes.
- How to regulate your own nervous system under pressure
- Why the Trench happens — and how to stop sinking
- Seeing the people you love more accurately
- How to tell the truth without needing anyone to like it
- Self-Validated Intimacy — the key to real closeness
- Going First in the bedroom — what that actually looks like
- How one person’s growth changes the entire dynamic
- A framework built for real marriages, not ideal ones
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Go first.
And watch what happens.
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