About Simple Marriage
Before the podcast.
Before the books.
There was this.
Simple Marriage began in 2006 as a place to write honestly about what actually happens inside a marriage — and what it takes to grow up inside one. All these years later, that’s still the same idea.
What This Place Is
A writing home built on one simple (but not easy) idea.
Simple Marriage is the original home. Sexy Marriage Radio grew out of it. The books, the podcast, the courses, the community — all of it traces back here. This is where the thinking happened first.
Which makes it the right place to bring the writing back. Essays, honest ideas, and clear thinking on marriage, desire, conflict, and self-leadership. No scripts. No 10-step plans. No pretending it’s easier than it is.
The thread running through everything here is the same one that runs through 775+ SMR podcast episodes and 20+ years of clinical work: the person who goes first changes the marriage. Not as a technique. As a way of being.
Corey Allan · DFW, Texas
The Person Behind It
Dr. Corey Allan
PhD · LMFT · Host, Sexy Marriage RadioI’m a licensed marriage and family therapist, husband, father, runner, and person of faith. I’ve been in private practice since 2002. I haven’t missed a week of the podcast in 14 years. I’ve been married to Pam for over 30 years.
The thread running through all of it is the same: stop waiting on your spouse to change and start leading yourself. Not as a tactic to get what you want. As a way of becoming who you’re capable of being — inside the most important relationship of your life.
I also believe the generational impact of one healthy marriage can be felt a hundred years from now. On the kids it raises. On their kids. One marriage creating a legacy. That’s not a metaphor. That’s the mission.
The Philosophy
Not tips.
Not techniques.
Something deeper.
The framework running through Simple Marriage is differentiation — the idea that a stronger sense of self in each partner is what makes genuine closeness possible. It’s not a communication script. It’s a lens. Once you see through it, you can’t unsee it.
Differentiation-based
A stronger you makes a better marriage — not two people merging into one. The goal is two whole people choosing each other, not two half-people completing each other.
Go First
The one who moves first — without conditions, without guarantees — is the one who changes the dynamic. Waiting is a strategy. It just doesn’t work.
Self-leadership over spouse management
Most marriage advice is really just tactics to get your partner to change. This isn’t that. It’s about becoming the person you’re capable of being — inside your marriage.
Faith-friendly
Taking Scripture seriously without offering pat religious answers. Real faith can handle honest conversations about desire, conflict, and doubt.
“That one marriage could create a legacy felt 100 years from now. That one marriage is yours.”— Dr. Corey Allan (Yes, I’m quoting myself here :))