Getting Along With Your Spouse’s Family During the Holidays

Enjoying Family at Holidays“I just don’t understand why your mom has to have the Christmas decorations like that. It’s dangerous for the kids.”

“Maybe I don’t feel like going Christmas caroling in the neighborhood. Why can’t your dad understand that?”

“Why does your sister insist we keep up with that silly tradition? I never did that in my family.”

Yes, the holidays are in full swing and that means visiting with family.

And it often means (gulp) visiting your in-laws and possibly the entire clan.

During the holidays, emotions and expectations run high. Getting along with your own family can be challenging enough let alone getting along with your spouse’s family.

To maintain marital happiness, it’s important to know how to not only survive the holidays with your extended family, but to really enjoy them.[Continue Reading…]

How to Get the Perfect Present for Your Spouse

The Perfect GiftThe holidays are here and the gift giving season is upon us.

Finding the perfect present for your spouse can be a tricky thing.

It’s easy to get caught up simply buying stuff and forgetting the real spirit of the season.

So what’s the secret to getting your loved one the perfect present this year?

It all starts with one word: intent

The goal of gift giving is to show your intent – that you care.

There’s the famous saying, “it’s the thought that counts”. And it’s true. But when it’s followed up with a genuinely cool present, it makes it the perfect gift.[Continue Reading…]

How to Date Every Week… Guaranteed!

Couple on DateHow to date every week guaranteed. Really?

It sounds like something that you would see on a singles dating website or in your spam filter, right?

Not necessarily something that you would see on a website for old married folks like us.

But we all know that dating in marriage is just as important, if not more important, than dating in the single life.

The Challenge with Dating Every Week

The big problem with dating every week is that life gets in the way!

The week starts off with a busy Monday and doesn’t usually let up until sometime towards the end of the week.

Then the weekend hits. If you’re like most people, soccer games, trips to the hardware store, and chores somehow manage to eat up all of your free time.[Continue Reading…]

Why You Should Never Say the “D-word” in Your Marriage

Positive WordsThe other night, my wife and I were visiting with some friends. At one point, a funny but hypothetical situation was brought up and my wife said, “I don’t know, I’d…”

She couldn’t finish her sentence.

After some coaxing, we finally got her to say what she couldn’t before. She said, “I don’t know, I’d probably divorce him”.

Even joking with friends it was hard to say.

The reason it was so hard for her was because early on in our marriage, we both decided that we would never even mention the “D-word”, not even in joking.

We’ve both conditioned ourselves to avoid the word. It’s easy – neither of us ever want a divorce, so why ever even say it?

Now, whenever we hear someone say the word, it just feels wrong. Dirty. Like a vulgar word. I don’t even like typing it![Continue Reading…]

The Fun of Going on “Dress Up” Dates

Dress Up DateNot too long after we were married, my wife and I met some friends for a double date. We were doing the normal thing – dinner and a movie.

Before we left the house, for some reason, we decided it would be funny to dress up like nerds. I take that back. It wasn’t dressing as nerds as much as it was finding random, wild clothes in our closet that absolutely didn’t match.

We walked to the restaurant where we were meeting our friends and giggled as we saw people staring strangely at us.

After all, I was wearing big work boots, 80’s shorts, a dress up shirt, and a headband while my wife was wearing a mix of flip flops, leggings, leather pants, sweater, complete with a flashy red cape.

Yeah, we were nerds.[Continue Reading…]

The Slow Date

Couple at SunsetRemember speed dating?

You sit down and try to impress the person on the other side of the table in 30 seconds or less before moving on to the next person.

How effective it actually is depends on each person.

In marriage, we need to go on dates too. Obviously, we aren’t going to go out and meet other people (if you are, you probably shouldn’t be reading this blog).

But, we need to make dating a priority and since we’re married, we have plenty of time. One idea for the actual type of date to go on is what I refer to as the Slow Date.

What is the Slow Date?

Going on a slow date simply refers to going out and doing something that puts the attention on you and your spouse – not the activity.

Going to the opera or bungee jumping are great date ideas, but the purpose of the slow date is to take a break from being distracted and really get into each other.

The thinking here is that sometimes it’s really the most simple things in life that bring the most satisfaction. There’s no reason this can’t include dates.[Continue Reading…]